Searchin’ the Search Phrases: 2010

End-of-the-year tradition time! One of mine is to go through the search phrases that resulted in a hit on my site over the past year. The most common phrase was “Rowan McBride,” although this time around there were a slew of creative misspellings of my name, which has me siked because it means that people who aren’t all that familiar with me are looking for me, and in theory that’s a good thing career-wise. XD

Also, “Author Rowan” will get you to my site without any trouble. Who knew?

There were phrase and story title combinations that help me from a stats and marketing point of view, but as always my favorites are the ones that make me laugh or tilt my head in confusion. Listing them in no particular order below in the hopes that they’ll make you do the same.

  • dalek haiku
    Yeah baby!
  • watching him orgasm
    Who? Was he hot? Did he know??
  • rat pack cardboard cutouts
    I want an invite to that party.
  • bhargava s 33 theorem asserts
    You know what google says the rest of that sentence is?

    …that an integral quadratic form represents all odd numbers if it represents 1, 3, 5, 7, 11, 15 and 33. – T. D. Noe (noe(AT), Mar 30 2006

    Know what it means? Me either, but since Seth and Nick are the math geeks on my site, I’m choosing to blame them even though neither of them use this particular theorem in their stories.

    Look at that. I actually searched a search phrase this year. Title of blog segment validated.

  • he rubbed his hand up my thigh
    Hey, hey now. Maybe you should slow down there…
  • he slipped his hand into my pants and stroked my stiffening cock
    I didn’t. I swear.
  • pushed myself forward as if i felt a slow big fingers caressing my hairy crack
  • what s wrong? isn t that what you wanted
    About here is when I began to wonder if I was being *deliberately* molested via search engine.
  • how to play three blind mice
    I can actually help you with this if you’re looking to play it on piano, guitar, recorder, or xylophone. Weirdly enough I don’t know all the words, so I can’t sing it. Not that you’d want me to.
  • his ass cock whimpered or load or deep or again or another or cum his pucker -she -her
    This searcher either doesn’t know what the hell they want or knows EXACTLY what they want and is a Boolean genius.
  • i got skin grown over my shoulder
    I’m no expert, but I think that’s supposed to be there.
  • site http //
    This page doesn’t exist, but it totally should.
  • you and the little mermaid can go
    That sounds like the beginning of the best cursing out ever.
  • plunder rowan mcbride
    Pass. That’s pirate pillow talk, and I’m all about the ninjas.
  • i buried my head in his chest and he wrapped his arms around me he laughed into my hair and i felt his warm breath on my face
    I don’t have a smartass comment for this one. I’m just feeling sentimental at the end of the year and liked the imagery.

And my favorite search phrase of 2010 is:

  • jascia sex tube
    I don’t know what the hell it is, but I feel like the story needs one. Bad.

That’s it. For me 2010 was about finding my muse again. It took a while, but I feel like there’ll be some good stuff in 2011.

I hope there’s good stuff in 2011 for you too. 😉

Happy New Year!

— Rowan

3 Responses to “Searchin’ the Search Phrases: 2010”

  1. Those are some detailed search parameters! o_0

    My best one of the year just came through the other day:

    “f/f picnic spanking mustard bottle”

    Um okay, what exactly was this person looking for and how did they end up at my blog???

  2. @Katrina Strauss – Haha. It’s one of the many mysteries of the interweb.

  3. Jen K says:

    I love reading search phrases for websites. I can’t decide which one is better… “his ass cock whimpered…” or “f/f picnic spanking mustard bottle.” Thanks for the giggle. 🙂

    p.s. Have you see this post on ninjas vs. pirates? Fun stuff. 🙂

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