Archive for the ‘myspace’ Category

It’s Raining Men

Thursday, March 5th, 2009

Note: This blog was originally published on my MySpace blog, February 9, 2009.

I’m ridiculously fond of this amv by StriderTol. It makes me laugh while at the same time totally feeding my pervy nature.

Angsty Werewolf Book Trailer

Thursday, March 5th, 2009

Note: This blog was originally published on my MySpace blog, February 4, 2009.

Lone (my very first werewolf story!) will be available from Amber Allure in May 2009. Made a book trailer. Hope you like it.

If you’d like more information on the novel, check out my website at:

Been Nominated for a CAPA

Thursday, March 5th, 2009

Note: This blog was originally published on my MySpace blog, January 31, 2009.

I’ve been nominated for a Cupid and Psyche Award. How cool is that? Favorite Erotic Author. Even got a cool new sticker for my website!

I liked it so much that I updated my About Me ( page just so I could display it on my site. I also finally got around to adding a “Best of Rowan’s Ramblings” section, so now you can read all my best blogs neatly organized by year.

Much thanks to The Romance Studio for the nomination! I’m honored!

New Book. New Contract. New Cover.

Thursday, March 5th, 2009

Note: This blog was originally published on my MySpace blog, January 15, 2009.

Finished my werewolf novel, and Amber Allure accepted it last week! It’s called Lone, and it’s got a tentative release scheduled for March. W00t!

I love Lone. I finished it ages ago, but I kept tweaking it and tweaking it. Wanted Rafe to be strong and forthright. Wanted Seth to be sweet and just a little bit psychotic (which, surprisingly, is a hard combination to pull off). In the end, I think I achieved everything I wanted, and I think it’s a pretty good story.

Today I also got my cover, and I’m digging the blue angst:

I can’t believe so much has happened and it’s only the middle of January. I hope it’s a sign of how the rest of 2009 is going to go.

If you’d like to learn more about the story, check out my website at:

I think now’s a good as time to any to break in my new happy dance:

Boy Meets Bishie

Thursday, March 5th, 2009

Note: This blog was originally published on my MySpace blog, January 6, 2009.

I have a brand new logo, drawn by the fabulous Anne Cain:

Rowan McBride's Boy Meets Bishie logo

You’re drooling, aren’t ya? Admit it. 

Blood equals Smex

Thursday, March 5th, 2009

Note: This blog was originally published on my MySpace blog, .

I like to think most of my characters are pretty sweet. I’ve been told by more than one person that this just isn’t true, so that probably says something about me right there.

But sometimes, gawd, I just want a hardcore blood=smex yaoi that makes my heart race.

Sadistic Seme: 1. A ridiculously hot guy who enjoys putting a little hurt on the love of his life. Said love will usually (eventually) adore him for it. 2. Teh smex.

In my anime, I always go for the sadistic seme. I don’t know what the hell that is—if I ever ran into one in real life I’d either kick his ass or run the other direction, depending on his skill level and mine. But, holy crap, in anime and video games I almost always go for the most psychotic character in the series. Sephiroth (Final Fantasy), Light Yagami (Death Note), and Seishiro (Tokyo Babylon and X/1999), just to name a few.

In my own stories, I don’t think I’ve written a genuine sadistic seme yet. Probably the closest I’ve come so far is Walker Cain. But while he does put a bit of a hurt on Joel, Walker is a little too erratic in his methodology. In my mind, a sadistic seme is deliberate with his actions, hence the scary/sexy vibe they give off.

My all time favorite sadistic seme would have to be Akabane Kuroudo, of GetBackers. Tall, dark, deadly. Rocks an utterly massive hat that only he could make look cool. He’s polite, well-spoken, ruthless. If he doesn’t like you, it’s generally a quick death. If he DOES like you, then you’re in a busload of trouble because he’ll want to play.

I get shivers just thinking about him. There’s something really wrong with me.

Wrong or not, I made an AMV (anime music video) featuring Akabane, as well as the poor shmuck he’s set his eyes on. I had a lot of fun tinkering with this, as well as a heap of frustration since it was my first time playing with Adobe Premiere. But if it turns you on to a certain sadistic seme, then it was worth it. 😉

Note: I don’t own the music, I don’t own the anime. This is a purely fan-made video and intended for fun, not profit.

If there are problems with the above video, check it out at, but be sure to click the high quality button if you can. Hope you like the vid!

Searching the Search Phrases ’08

Thursday, March 5th, 2009

Note: This blog was originally published on my MySpace blog, January 1, 2009.

This time last year I posted my favorite search phrases that managed to hit It was so much fun I thought I’d try and make it a tradition. So here are my faves of 2008 in no particular order:

  • Patrick Fillion
    Probably because I link to his site from my Links page. Man, if you don’t know who he is, visit his place now.

  • anime muscle growth
    This one also gave me hits last year. Again, if you know of some, let me know.

  • muscle growth werewolf
    I’m hoping to submit my werewolf novel by the stroke of midnight tonight, but no muscle growth this time around.

  • want me rowan mcbride
    Always good to know I’m loved.

  • toolbox
    Yeah, I got nothin’.

  • yaoi animated gifs
    Who doesn’t want more of those?

gravitation yuki shuichi kiss avatar yaoiboys yaoi avatar

  • work on more than one story at a time
    Hey! I do that! Which is, ah, why it takes me so long to finish anything, so I hope they weren’t looking for advice.

  • myfirstchesthair
    This was one from last year too! Why are there so many people Googling this?!

  • lousy chest hair
    I actually felt bad—no one should be cursed with such a thing.

  • locked collar around his neck
    I thought this one was hot, and starting plotting out a story featuring the imagery. Then I remembered that, riiiight, *Kian* spent the prologue of Paul’s Dream with a collar around his neck. Still, doesn’t mean I can’t write more, right?

So those are my faves. I’m hoping they get even weirder in 2009. One of many things I’m very much looking forward to.

Everyone, have a Happy New Year.

Note: Originally many of the links in this blog led to MySpace, and have since been changed to make them easier to access from this portal.

Note to someone who might be my sixteen year old self

Thursday, March 5th, 2009

Note: This blog was originally published on my MySpace blog, November 18, 2008.

Looking back, there’s one thing I wish someone had told me when I was a kid. It would have made my life so much easier:

“You don’t have to choose.”

Growing up, I was taught that boys were boys and girls were girls. Not fitting into either category was just asking for trouble, especially once I hit high school. I didn’t know what was wrong with me, and I always felt like an outsider. Which, really, is par for the course in high school, so I don’t remember it as a particularly bad experience.

I don’t think I was ever myself in high school, though. My focus was on being the perfect kid, so I was always on the honor roll (except for senior year, because I skipped a lot of school to go to the beach), I was almost never in trouble (almost never got caught), and pretty much did whatever was expected of me. Outside of writing (in composition notebooks, yeah!) I didn’t really care about anything, least of all myself. I sorta just let fate have its way with me, and fate did an okay job.

College gave me a little room to stretch and, god, it felt good. I had an eighteen hour course load, two jobs, was a member of almost every club on campus, volunteered, had a short stint as a chaplain, learned to dance, got my first kiss, and won a poetry contest. And it was a liberal arts college, so I could do things like take Archery the same semester I took Environmental Biology. A light went on inside of me and I went, “Holy crap! I can do everything!”

Then I went to law school and it was time to cram myself into a box again. This time it didn’t go so well. The classes were law, the clubs were law, all anyone ever talked about was law. You were supposed to conduct yourself a certain way and dress accordingly. I don’t remember ever being so miserable in my life, but I was determined to stick it out.

Fate saved my ass by striking me down. I was in the hospital for three weeks. A year later, I officially let my school know I was never going back.

I’m probably sharing too much here. But I wanted to give a little background on where I was coming from, because I didn’t start living until the year I almost died. It was scary and confusing and it hurt like hell, but for the first time in my life I felt like I was someone real.

I’ve known I’m gender fluid for a long time. For those who are unfamiliar with the term, the Urban Dictionary defines it this way:

Gender Fluid is a gender identity best described as a dynamic mix of boy and girl. A person who is Gender Fluid may always feel like a mix of the two traditional genders, but may feel more boy some days, and more girl other days.

Being Gender Fluid has nothing to do with which set of genitalia one has, nor their sexual orientation.

Wikipedia also has a pretty good article on being genderqueer/gender fluid.

I cried when I first heard the term. Not only did it fit, but it meant that there were other people out there like me. It was okay that I didn’t identify as a man or a woman, it was okay to be what I felt when I felt like it.

There were problems, of course. On a practical level, filling out forms is a constant headache. Not many of them let you go “unspecified” or “other,” so I generally choose “male” because that’s the closest that fits. On a personal level, people will tell me that I’m indecisive, that I should just go ahead and get the operation already, that I’m in denial about my sexuality, etc etc etc. The fact is, I didn’t choose to be in between any more than another person chooses to be gay or straight, male or female.

And for the record, anyone who says it’s easy to be in between is fucking insane. Some people get mad when you don’t identify as one or the other. And I cringe every time I read some rant on the internet telling a genderqueer person to “Get off the fence” or starting a sentence with “They claim to be…” I get the impression that they want a Proof of Queer card or something.

There is no Proof of Queer card. As far as I know. As implied above, I’m bad with forms so maybe I missed the registration process.

It took me a quarter of a century to discover that I was, in fact, a real person. I fully believe it’ll take the rest of my life to find out who I am, and that is true for a lot of (if not most) people. My world isn’t binary and I’m far more complicated than is convenient. It’s interesting, though. And an adventure.

So, to all the in between people out there, whether it’s your gender, sexual orientation, race, or anything else—You don’t have to choose. You are who you are, and you’re allowed to live your life.


A friend asked me to include an FAQ on being gender fluid. I don’t feel comfortable doing that, since everyone is different, but here’s a quick FAQ on being Rowan:

Are you a man or a woman?

My gender flows back and forth. While I don’t identify 100% as either male or female, I tend to hang out more on the male side of things.

Yeah yeah, but what’s in your underwear?



Yes, why? Would knowing what I’m packing in my pants change who I am or what I write?

Now you’re just trying to be mysterious. What are you hiding?

I’m not hiding anything, it’s just (ahem) private. You probably wouldn’t ask the boi at the flower shop if they have a penis or vagina, or if they’re gay or straight (at least, I hope you wouldn’t, since it’s none of your business if you’re just there to buy flowers).

We’re not friends and you’re not asking me out. If you should see me on the street (or at a convention), you’ll know instantly what parts I was born with. It’s been a source of dysphoria for me on and off all my life because I don’t have an androgynous body. However, I’m not about to start every online conversation with, “Hey, how you doin’? I’m gender fluid and have a ___ between my legs.”

My friends and family know. My online friends who become my real friends know. Now that I’m a little older, if I see I’m heading for an awkward situation, I generally nip things in the bud and let those people know.

But I’m just a writer, and not everyone needs to know.

Okay okay. But what do I call you?


C’mon, you know what I mean. Are you a he, she, or it?

Oh, god. Call me anything but “it.”

When I first started to get published, I’d write the reviewers and ask if they could change the “Miss” or “Ms.” to “Mr.” I wasn’t used to having a public online life, and I figured consistency was important. Now I let either of them go, since I figure it’s at least accurate part of the time.

Personally, I like gender neutral pronouns such as “hir” for him/her and “sie” for he/she, but not many people are familiar with them. Plus there are lots of other neutral pronouns out there and no standardized system from what I can see. One of my all time favorites to be called is Mx. Rowan McBride, but it hasn’t caught on yet.

I’m fine with being called “he” or “she,” but I will admit that it jars me a little to hear “she.”

Would you call yourself transgender?

Sometimes, but generally when people think of a transgender person they’re thinking of someone who’s making or planning to make a permanent transition. For that reason I prefer the term gender fluid.

So…when’s your next book coming out?



Down with OTP (yeah, you know me)

Thursday, March 5th, 2009

Note: This blog was originally published on my MySpace blog, October 16, 2008.

First, I have to apologize for the truly awful title of this particular blog. I seem to be getting worse and worse at this. 🙂

Second, below is a clip from a random IM conversation I had with Katrina Strauss the other day. I edited our screen names, so “R” stands for “Rowan” and “K” stands for “Katrina.”

R: hey, who’s your number 1 otp?
K: seph x cloud, baby.
K: opens the door for all sorts of dark, twisted, noncon lovin’ lol
R: haha
R: that’s def a good one
R: omg, love that scene where seph appears in Advent Children
R: it’s so flirtatious
R: in a ‘you might die from my lovin and i’m okay with that’ sort of way…
K: lol
K: yes it’s very sexy when he tells clouds it’s been a while
K: it’s like, a while since what? we want to know!

OTP stands for One True Pair. Nearly everyone I know has one—mine is Byakuya x Renji. The appeal of my OTP is similar to Katrina’s, in that I adore that Blood=Smex hawtness. It’s not cannon and it’s probably very, very wrong, but I can’t help it. I get thrills whenever I see them together.

The whole conversation was so much fun. Now I’m dying to know—What’s your OTP?

A hot and sanctioned couple like Katou and Iwaki?

Is it a pairing that will never, ever be cannon (er, Spock/Kirk comes to mind) but is wicked fun to imagine?

From anime/manga? From movies/TV? More traditional media?

Tell me who. Tell me why. If you have more than one favorite pairing, share the love. Byakuya x Renji is my OTP, but Chris x Darien in Jet Mykles’s Heaven Sent series still make my toes curl. Rock star, hot British lawyer… I didn’t stand a chance. 😉

Can’t wait to see your responses. I’m always curious about which characters people pair together. Every once in a while someone shares one I’d never considered before, and I’m exposed to an entirely new world of hawtness.

And, really, who couldn’t use more hawtness?

Note: Many of the original MySpace links have been changed to make surfing easier on this portal.

Banned? Me? But I’m a freaking angel!

Thursday, March 5th, 2009

Note: This blog was originally published on my MySpace blog, September 17, 2008.

Who would have thought one tiny little 100×100 pixel picture could get the big red stamp from PhotoBucket?

I was updating my MySpace page with the usual once-overs—checking links to make sure they still worked (most of them did, except for two that the Space was *sure* were malicious), and refreshing the page a few times to make sure that the images that weren’t loading were actually broken and not just being ornery. Three images needed replacing, so I uploaded them to PhotoBucket and coded them into my site. It worked, and I felt totally handy.

Then in the middle of the night (hardcore nightowl, yeah!) I check back to gaze upon my fully functional page. Given my color scheme, the big red image that replaced my newsletter image was pretty easy to spot:


While I don’t think I’ve committed any of the listed prohibitions in their Terms of Use, PhotoBucket does say they can remove an image for any reason or for no reason at all. That pretty much makes them God in PhotoBucket land, and sort of a capricious one. But still, I thought my newsletter image was pretty innocent:

It’s not like they’re naked. Well, I think the guy behind him might actually be nude, but it’s not like you can SEE that.

Sigh. I suppose the silver lining here is that *I’m* not personally banned from PhotoBucket, otherwise all my images would be big red stickers and that would be a pain in the ass to fix on the fly. Tomorrow I’ll see if my creative problem solving skills (remember those? Touted by Orientation to College Life, or something?) will come in handy as far as finding a long term solution for my images.

But now I shall go to bed, because I think this is my first rant blog, and I’m sure no good can come of it. 😉

PS– I got the newsletter image above to post in this blog because I uploaded it to my DeviantArt site tonight.  DA isn’t really a hosting service, though, so I’ll see need to find a permanent solution once my brain starts working again.