Thank you

January 18th, 2019

Writing again to say how much I appreciate your generosity. I was blown away when you funded my website in under 24hrs. Absolutely did not see that coming. I’ve taken the goal status bar down, because you funded the campaign to 132% and that’s…amazing. I was able to pay for my hosting fees as well as my domain name for the next year. I’ve updated my site, so hopefully there won’t be any more confusion over what’s available, what’s not, and what’s coming soon.

With the extra money, I bought some image editing software, since it looks like I’m going to be doing some of my own book covers while I save up to commission an artist for others. All in all, a crazy good start to the new year. 🙂

I downloaded new (and free! yes!) word processing software, so I’m gearing up to buckling down. I feel better and more motivated than I have for a long time, and it is in no small part due to you.

As for the Ko-fi page. It seems a bit weird to have it and not utilize it in any way, so I’m going to try putting the link in my email signature and newsletter updates, as well as a non-clickable version of it here (since this blog is attached to a site with adult content, and Ko-fi rules say not to link to or from those sort of sites). This is NOT me asking for more money, so please don’t take it that way. 🙂 I just like the idea of, well, all things coffee. lol.

I’m off to re-read Jascian so I don’t drill any plot holes into the new chapter. And also to see if I can create a new cover for True: Ethan so I can make it available for download. Thank you again. You have no idea how much seeing that progress bar fill up meant to me. I get to keep my site. So cool.

Take care,
— Rowan

Want to buy me a coffee? Go to ko-fi dot com /rowanmcbride.  🙂

You guys…

January 1st, 2019

It hasn’t even been 24hrs and you’ve funded 98% of my website. I… I don’t know what to say. I’m grateful to have you all in my life, and tomorrow I’m going to make sure to thank each individual donor on the Ko-fi site.

“Thank you” doesn’t begin to express my feels right now, but right now it’s all I’ve got, so thank you.

Sincerely,
— Rowan

New year, new…year.

January 1st, 2019

Okay, I meant to have a more upbeat title, but I honestly couldn’t think of one. O.O

2018 was a wicked rough year for me, and I wanted to share some of what I’ve been going through. Some of you know that I have Schizoaffective Disorder, which is this oh so joyful combination Schizophrenia and bipolar disorder. I was diagnosed in 2001, but by 2006 (year I published my first novel!) it was pretty well controlled. Last year, though, my brain was like “nah.”

Medication was no longer effective. Went through a whole lot of other meds trying to find one that worked, but I’m medication resistant so that’s been a challenge.

Back in June I had a full-on psychotic break. Shortly thereafter I attempted to kill myself 1 and a half times. I say “half” because the second time I called my local crisis center and was talked down by a very nice lady whose name I cannot remember. It was my first time ever calling a crisis hotline, and if you’re depressed or suicidal or in the middle of a psychotic break or whatever, call yours. If you don’t know yours, call the national hotline at 1-800-273-8255. They are open 24 hours a day. Please please call if you’re in trouble. There’s a good chance I wouldn’t be here if not for the nice lady whose name I can’t remember, and honestly we all deserve a chance to be here.

Also in June, I woke up and found out I couldn’t walk. Two days after that, my mom almost died after a routine colonoscopy (perforated colon). Now I’m walking with a cane, which is good, and my mother is fine, which is better.

But you can see how June was a royal suckfest for me. I’m still recovering.

This month I have to see a neurologist and start tests to see if I have multiple sclerosis. I also have to get screened for 2 separate forms of cancer. I’m choosing not to worry until there’s something to worry about.

Now I seem to be on some psych meds that are helping me want to do things again. Like {gasp} write! Currently the plan is to upload a few of my orphaned stories, update “The Jascian’s Toy,” and work on “True: William.”

Here’s where I need your help. Since all but one of my publishers closed, I am now an actual starving artist. I’m scraping by okay, but I can’t renew my website hosting fees. And I love that website. I learned html over the course of a weekend and created every single page myself. I don’t want to let it go.

So if you could help by donating through my Ko-fi page, I would sorely appreciate it. I’ve posted chapter 1 of a rough draft of “True: William” as a thank you if you do happen to stop by. Ko-fi has rules about linking to and from pages containing adult content, and I’m not sure if this blog would count, but it is connected to the main website, so maybe? But the link is easy enough. www dot Ko-fi dot com/rowanmcbride.

2019 has just started. As of now I’ve updated this blog for the first time in FAR too long, and I’ve posted something new to read. That alone pretty much makes it an improvement over the whole of 2018, and I genuinely feel like I’m just getting started.

How’s that for upbeat? 😉

Great news!

December 15th, 2017

I don’t have cancer!

Not the greatest day

December 1st, 2017

This morning I had to go to the hospital to have a “suspicious tumor” surgically removed. I find out on the 15th if it’s cancer.

I found out tonight that my main publisher Loose Id is closing. That happens in May. You can read more about it here.

I’m…tired. So I haven’t decided yet what I’m going to do. All but one of my currently in-print books are with LI. I could resubmit elsewhere, but LI was rock solid and now they’re shutting their doors. I could self-publish, but I’ve done that twice and hated it both times. I could, well, stop.

I don’t know.

And come to think of it, how screwed up am I to be more upset that my publisher is closing than at the idea I might have cancer?

Maybe I need to step back and get my priorities in line.

Ethan review!

September 11th, 2017

Serena Yates from Rainbow Book Reviews has read True: Ethan and had a lot of awesome things to say. One such bit of awesome:

“I think it’s an amazing feat to put this much worldbuilding and character development in such a short book, and as a result it felt longer than its number of pages.”

To read the rest, go to http://www.rainbowbookreviews.com/book-reviews/ethan-true-1-by-rowan-mcbride-at-loose-id .

“True: Ethan” is now available!

August 28th, 2017

W00t!

Blurb:

Ethan is a shapeshifter whose life force is rooted in the ability to love. When he is cast aside by his mate of six years, he has one cycle of the moon to find a new one. If he does, he is reborn. If he doesn’t…

He dies.

Brendan isn’t going to let him die.

***

Pick it up now  at Loose Id for FREE!

 

Ethan’s Excerpt

August 25th, 2017

I’ve put up an excerpt from True: Ethan. You can read it here

Are you excited the story’s coming out this Tuesday? I’m totally excited!

Release date!

August 7th, 2017

True: Ethan” will be out August 29th, 2017! W00t!

Let’s show a reader some love.

July 28th, 2017

Recently, I received a comment (copy/pasted below) from a Jascian reader that broke my heart. They live in a place where buying gay-themed books (physical or digital) could get them into a lot of trouble, so they can only read stories that are posted online. While I do intend to update Jascian as soon as I can, realistically that could take a while. So I’m asking for suggestions from you. Gay male love stories (centered around love, not just sex) that don’t have to be downloaded in order to be read. I know there are a lot of really, really great stories posted online for free, and I’d very much like to show this reader that we as a community care.

 

Please post your suggestions in the comment section of my home blog (not tumblr, twitter, or Good Reads) to make them easier to access. Whatever platform you’re reading this on should have a link to it, but just in case: http://rowanmcbride.com/blog/?p=391 . They didn’t ask for any of this, but if it were me a story suggestion, or a few words of personal encouragement, would go a long way.

 

Thank you. And thank you to w. brown for writing to me.

__________________________________

From w. brown:

 

This is harking back to antiquity and another topic but the theme is timeless and I don’t see it on the index.

 

I’d give anything to read the continuation of the story, The Jascian’s Toy.

 

I live in a country with an oppressive attitude toward LGBT, a country where nobody is out because being out would mean the end of your career, eviction from your home, the loss of most if not all your friends because people would be desperate to show that the contamination of association with a gay had not wiped off on them. Gays who have been discovered while they’re doing military service have been killed because it gets them out of barracks nobody would want to share with them. Gay bars are a hopeless dream here. There are covert meeting places but they can be dangerous and at the best are little better than a meat market. You might meet a guy you like but just as likely meet one that you need to hide from later and there’s isn’t any time to linger over finding somebody compatible. It’s the luck of a hasty draw that determines who your partner is.

 

Buying a book from abroad would be impossible because it never would clear customs. I would even be afraid of getting anything by email since I don’t know if surveillance would extend to it, or to transactions needed to obtain it. The only source I have to read LGBT material is sites like this, of authors who have generously shared their work in public because I still have anonymous access to some PCs at my workplace. This story in particular has been a godsend since it is a masterpiece, and an abiding consolation that I can resort to without growing tired of it. It is the thing I always turn to when I feel discouraged. I can feel there is a happy ending lurking in it and that Gavin will find a way of showing Blake where his true happiness may lie, and Blake will quietly continue to improve the plight of lessers by urging Gavin to employ His power sympathetically. But it is more than just a beautiful romantic tale, the great adventure of the the love between The Ideal Giant and a human. It makes me feel that there is more to live for than the life I see around me. Every time I read it I want to be a better person, one like Blake, although I cannot be as brave as he is but I think that I could be as brave as I am on my best day.

 

Please, Mr McBride, do not forget about this life-changing story and that it is crying out for completion. Even the occasional addition of a chapter would be such a blessing.